Wednesday, 19 May 2010

Dear Sandra Rose

Dear Sandra
As one of the only Sasha Supremacists who actually performs cunningulus, there was a time where I hated you. There was a time where I dreamed of meeting you backstage at a Monica concert (shut up) and giving you a "You Told Harpo to Beat Me" smackdown. I used to hate you more than Sean Kingston hates The Biggest Loser but then I saw something.
What I saw hurt me so much, I thought about you and how you were feeling, how you were coping with it?

Now since I know you were too busy waxing your pussy lips to know what I'm talking about, take a gander below:

Mean, right?
Now there is no need to even go into whether what he said about you was right or wrong, because then we'd have to discuss how intelligent he is and I think Rihanna's face circa February 2009 answers that question. Instead of discussing Chris Brown, let's discuss you and what you need to do to counteract such hateful tweets.

1. Pledge your allegiance to a relevant entertainment force. No- Tiny doesnt count. Pledging your allegiance to someone with a giant fan base guarantees support in times like this, I'd advise Michael Jackson, his fans will defend anything as long as it defends their hero, don't talk about the little boys, the nose, the face, the brows or the lacefront and you're as good as in.

2. Support and exploit pain. This worked for Tyra Banks. Supporting and exploiting pain, eg abuse victims turned Top Model contestants, rape victims turned Tyra Banks show guests, anytime someone says something mean about you, people will assume that whoever is talking about you is also talking about the pain that you support and exploit. Why do you think most comedians dont talk about Tyra "The Hardest Thing I've Ever Had To Take Is My Producers 10 Inches" Banks, they don't want to be seen as being insensitive to her "altruistic" causes.

3. Stop talking shit about The Knowles'. I'm not sure how it will help you but it would make me happy, if you continue to talk scheisse about The Knowles' you can forget about our little date, (I take cash in advance and I don't do outcalls)

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